What the what?!!? Some old lady just hit on my dad!!!

Okay. Seriously. Did we really think I’d make it out of my last treatment day without some sort of hilarious story? Of course not!

Friday morning started off the same as any treatment day. I got up, took my shower, put my numbing cream on my port so that I wouldn’t feel Nurse Ratchet stabbing me and grabbed my pump, magazines, and iPod. Of course this Friday was the BIG DAY! The last treatment day and the meeting with Dr. Keefer where he’d let us know the process for the follow up. So mom AND dad were with me. Dad had said he wanted to sit with me on my last day. And he did.

We met with Dr. Keefer who was very positive and even got a little weepy at it being my last day. Then he gave me a big hug and ushered me back to the back.

And if anyone had any questions about it being my last day they only had to spot the tiara and balloons to be assured otherwise. Not to mention the bucket of homemade cookies I took for everyone and all the presents my mom was passing out to all the nurses. 

So I get in and get settled. Dad and I proceed to converse whilst mom dashes off to do some shopping and run a couple of errands. We’re into our conversation when I notice this older lady having a hard time getting a chair off the stack. I say “older lady” but she’s probably about 67 or 68 so only about 8 years older than my dad. Now I’ll admit those things are pretty challenging to get off the stack…so I asked dad if he could maybe help her. So he did. Then he made the mistake (apparently) of carrying the chair to where she needed it…nice gentleman that he is.

He comes back and sits down. After a while the lady comes back to the back bathroom by me (which there is another one WAY closer to where she was) and taps my dad on the shoulder as she’s passing by. Then she proceeds to hang out at the wigs. Then she comes back by and engages dad again by saying…”I just had to see if there was anything back there better than my own hair. Tee, hee, hee…”

I kid you not. There was a “tee, hee, hee”. I nearly fell out of my navy blue pleather barkalounger I was laughing so hard!

Hilarious! Oh man…you just can’t plan for those moments.

After that my sweet friend, Joyce, arrived with hamburgers and fries! Perfectly timed after my 2nd dose of anti-nausea meds. Ugh. She stayed for lunch and then wound up taking me home since mom had to be in Edmond for her physical therapy for her finger.

So I got home and spent the rest of the afternoon sleeping, dry-heaving, and crying. Yes. Crying. I think the culmination of the last 8 months, the stress, the pain, the worry, the nausea…all of it finally came crashing in and I just let it go. I was crying tears of pure, unadulterated relief. And my poor dad had to be there for the whole messy display. Poor dad. He did what most dad’s do in that situation…he got me a drink (some iced tea if I hadn’t been dry heaving it probably would have been a scotch) and a wet rag.

The rest of the weekend was spent warding off the nausea and sleeping. Yesterday I convinced my home health care nurse to come early. Mom asked if my pump had gone off and I said…”No. And at this point I’m like ‘F’ it!” So I turned it off with 5mL left and let the nurse unplug me. It was my final attempt at rebellion.

Today I’m feeling slightly better. Mondays, post treatment, are always so difficult for me. I’m just generally tired and pukey. Always a fun combination at work. Nevertheless, I called the doctor’s office today to schedule my CT scan for Friday and after that comes back all clear (which we are all expecting) they will set up my procedure with Hot Surgeon to get my port taken out. Woohoo!!! The only thing standing between me and final freedom is a couple of nasty barium “fruit smoothies” for the CT scan and my date with Hot Surgeon.

Can. Not. Wait.